Random Thoughts : Is Ghosting Ever OK?

Is Ghosting ever OK? Do you know what ghosting is?Have you ever been Ghosted before?For those who are unfamiliar with the term ,”Ghosting” (Maybe you live under a rock?),  is the act, of suddenly ceasing communication with someone the subject is dating but no longer wishes to date, according to the Urban Dictionary.

So now it’s Story time!

I once went out with this guy, (I won’t give out his name, I know how ya’ll are nosey). I really liked him and I don’t like a lot of guys that much. He was the sweetest, kindest person. I initially didn’t like him, because he wasn’t really my type, but he would always compliment me on my style and he would always flirt with me. Then I observed that we seemed to have a lot in common, so I decided to give him a chance.

We would spend hours just talking on the phone and it would never get boring. I felt like he just got me, you know?. Ladies, have you ever felt that way before?

We would text and call each other all the time, but then he just ghosted me. How did I know he ghosted me? Well, I texted him one day, and no answer, then I texted on the weekend, no answer. I even texted him a week later, just to make sure, but still no response.

I was so hurt because I really did like him a lot and I could see us going longterm. I guess I was the only one thinking that?

He didn’t respond till 6 months later. To say that I was surprised, is an understatement. I was like, “What? Who is this?”. I asked him why he did it, and he said “It had nothing to do with you, just some personal issues”. I told him that him ghosting me made me really sad and to never do it again. And we went out again after that because I forgave him but it didn’t last, but that story, is for another time

How did it make me feel? Really sad because I felt like this guy, just really wasted my time and my biggest pet peeve is people wasting my time. I felt really inadequate, like I wasn’t enough. I really felt like I wasn’t even worth a goodbye.

How did I recover? I just decided to move on with my life and forget about him. Because if he had really cared about me, he would have never done that to me. I just decided to focus on other things.

Is it ever Ok to ghost someone you’re dating or anyone for that matter? I don’t think so. Yeah, everyone has issues, everyone is going through some difficult time. Yes I get that everyone handles situations differently, but what about treating people with respect? What about communicating?

It’s like this generation doesn’t know how to communicate anymore. We hide how we feel, and expect people to read our minds, but guess what? Only God can read minds, remember that.

And yes, I get that you might be going through stuff and you might want to use ghosting as a form of escapism, but let the person know. You know, just say to your significant other, “Hun, I’m not trying to be rude, but I need some time out”, or something. Don’t just leave someone in the dark not knowing what’s going on.

Hint : We won’t get the hint that you’re no longer interested until you tell us. So ghosting is an absolute waste of time. If you ghost people, you’re an ass. Yeah, I said it. So immature!

I know that him ghosting me, had nothing to do with me, I get that, but maybe give ya girl a warning before hand?

I think ghosting is really selfish. If you no longer like the person, tell them. If you want some alone time, tell them.

Lack of communication is why there are so many issues in the world today. That’s why there are so many instances of divorce all over.Be open, be sincere. If you don’t like someone, speak up.

Don’t leave someone in the dark because of your selfish ways.

I’m just sharing my experience with ghosting today XOXO

Have you ever been ghosted before? How did it make you feel?

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Random Thoughts : Would I Date a Homebody?

My friends and I recently had this discussion about homebodies vs outgoing people. For those who don’t know, homebodies are people who like to stay at  home, watch TV and basically chill all the time.I would consider myself, to probably be more on the Extrovert spectrum. I like to go out, I hate to chill. I’m not saying that I don’t chill, but if I had to choose between chilling and going out, I’d probably choose going out. Staying in, is just really boring to me. I’m just a happy go lucky person! The only time I’m really in my house is if I have to work, sleep or if I’m really stressed out. And I’m not a partier. In fact, I hate parties but I just like to go on adventures. Also, watching Netflix gets boring to me, after a while. Netflix doesn’t even have that many interesting shows son.

 

One of my friends, asked me the other day, if I would seriously date someone, who was a homebody. I had to really think about my answer, because that would be difficult. Not that it would be impossible, just difficult. I mean, if every time I had to force the person to go out, that would be annoying, and if they wanted me to stay in all the time I’d go crazy. It would just be chaos. I guess it makes me realize that I want someone who is as outgoing or more outgoing than I am. Haha, ain’t nothing wrong with that.

 

This discussion, then lead me to think about my friends. I feel like I can relate to, or I’m closer to people who are more outgoing. We have more things in common.I’m not saying that I don’t have homebody friends, I do, I just don’t really understand them. I don’t understand why someone would want to stay in. I mean, we live in Canada, a place that gets extremely  long, cold  winters. Why wouldn’t you want to take advantage of the hot sun?As I mentioned before, I just don’t understand homebodies, but even though I don’t understand them, I still love them. But would I date one though? Probably not.I know, some of you, are probably saying, “Wow, that’s so shallow”. But life is too short to settle.

As soon as a guy says he likes to stay in, I’m turned off. Haha, don’t judge me.My aim in life, isn’t to understand everything, or everyone, or I’d go crazy. I love everyone. HAHA, I’m not a homebody hater, so homebodies don’t come for me. I’m not telling ya’ll to change. I just don’t invite my homebody friends out that much because I know they answer will be no.I’m just showing things from my point of view.The moral of this story? If you’re a homebody or you’re outgoing, don’t change. Be yourself and the right person will come along.These are just my Random thoughts.

What did you think of this post? Are you more outgoing, or more someone who likes to stay in? Would you date someone who is the complete opposite of who you are?Comment below

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